Friday, February 14, 2014
Life's Greatest Gift is Life
I am a Grandma! This is my first grandbaby and what an experience. I barely got there in time to see her birth. There are no words to describe it.
I have decided that it is high time to do some writing on my blog. I am in South Carolina to meet my first grandchild. I arrived in time to see her born and I love her with all my heart. She is exquisite! My life has been full of grandma things, like changing diapers, hugging and holding and snuggling. I have also done some reading and played Bunko for the first time. It was a lot of fun!
We were caught in the big southern ice storm this week and had no power for almost 3 days. Of course we were cuddling the baby, as well as wearing our own layers of clothes and blankets around us to keep warm.
Oh how I love this sweet little girl.
When she is napping, I am learning how to use my Windows Surface RT. I am having a difficult time. I really don't think that is because of my Alzheimer's, since so many others have told me they think its not so easy for them as well. How ever, I couldn't fit my desktop in my bags. 😊
I am noticing 2 things that scare me, though. I am struggling to find words and communicate. Everyday common words get stuck and won't come to me. I also am noticing something more frightening. I have this déjà vu thing happening. It is creepy. Several times a day I feel like I've already done this before. I feel like a place is familiar or that I knew that someone was saying or doing some thing that I knew they were going to do before they said it. I can't make much sense of it. It is spooky because I am sure that I have already been there or heard that, but others tell me that I am mistaken.
Which brings up the reality that I am already dependent on others. I am unable to sort out events and thoughts without someone's help. Can I trust others to constantly guide me? What happens when I can't remember them! How will I know who to trust? Oh I don't like this at all. I know well that my family loves me, but will my mind know that in a year or two? This really scares me.
I do believe something that is important to me. I believe in a Heavenly Father who knows me and loves me.
Will I be able to feel comforted by him as I begin to forget who I am. Will I still know him?
We were caught in the big southern ice storm this week and had no power for almost 3 days. Of course we were cuddling the baby, as well as wearing our own layers of clothes and blankets around us to keep warm.
Oh how I love this sweet little girl.
When she is napping, I am learning how to use my Windows Surface RT. I am having a difficult time. I really don't think that is because of my Alzheimer's, since so many others have told me they think its not so easy for them as well. How ever, I couldn't fit my desktop in my bags. 😊
I am noticing 2 things that scare me, though. I am struggling to find words and communicate. Everyday common words get stuck and won't come to me. I also am noticing something more frightening. I have this déjà vu thing happening. It is creepy. Several times a day I feel like I've already done this before. I feel like a place is familiar or that I knew that someone was saying or doing some thing that I knew they were going to do before they said it. I can't make much sense of it. It is spooky because I am sure that I have already been there or heard that, but others tell me that I am mistaken.
Which brings up the reality that I am already dependent on others. I am unable to sort out events and thoughts without someone's help. Can I trust others to constantly guide me? What happens when I can't remember them! How will I know who to trust? Oh I don't like this at all. I know well that my family loves me, but will my mind know that in a year or two? This really scares me.
I do believe something that is important to me. I believe in a Heavenly Father who knows me and loves me.
Will I be able to feel comforted by him as I begin to forget who I am. Will I still know him?
Tuesday, February 4, 2014
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